Recommended: Paul Tripp's interview on "Messy marriages in the hands of a gracious God."
"The problem begins with unrealistic expectations in two areas: First, people don’t take seriously the fact that we live in a terribly broken world where things just don’t operate the way they were meant to. That means somehow, someway, everyday we greet some kind of difficulty – small or great. It’s just impossible to protect your marriage from the fallenness of the world. The second thing is we don’t take seriously what the Bible has to say about the fallenness of people – our own struggle with sin. I carry into my marriage something inside of me that is destructive to relationships. Sin makes me want to live for myself. Sin is self-focused, self-serving, self-absorbed, and, in that way, is anti-social. So couples not taking the Fall seriously and not taking the fallenness of people seriously, are unprepared for the kinds of things they are going to face as they get married."
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