Four Quick Jokes

A friend passed these four jokes on -- get a laugh start to your day!

1. A guy enters the monastery and he has to take a vow of silence, but once a year he can write a word on the chalkboard in front of the head monk. And so the first year, it's tough not to talk, but Word Day comes around and the monk writes, "The" on the chalkboard. And the second year is very painful — it's very difficult not to talk — and finally the Word Day rolls around. The monk scratches "food" on the chalkboard and enters his third year, which is excruciating, and the monk struggles through it, and when the day rolls around again, he writes "stinks." And the head monk says, "What's with you? You've been here for three years and all you've done is complain.

2. A man was praying to God. He said, "God!?" God responded, "Yes?" And the guy said, "Can I ask a question?" "Go right ahead," God said. "God, what is a million years to you?" God said, "A million years to me is only a second." "Hmmm," the man wondered. Then he asked, "God, what is a million dollars worth to you?" God said, "A million dollars to me is as a penny." So the man said, "God, can I have a penny?" And God cheerfully said, "Sure! Just a second."

3. Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed the serpent and the serpent didn't have a leg to stand on.

4. Why didn't Noah go fishing that often? He only had two worms.

Let's work for a Life-Oriented Culture

Dennis Prager outlines some astounding contrasts between the Egyptian culture and how the Lord led the Israelites in his recent column . Great stuff!

A Must-Have Book

I highly recommend you add Thomas Brooks' classic 1643 book, Precious Remedies Against Satan's Devices, to your library. Brooks was one of the great Puritan pastors. In this book he has laid bare the many schemes (devices) of Satan (see Ephesians 6:11 and 2 Cor 2:11), and the explicit "remedies" that God has provided us.