Fathers and Sons

The first part of this video is from the terrific film "Secondhand Lions"

Rerun: How I Use Blogs, Twitter, and Facebook to Encourage People

Except for using Hootsuite instead of SocialOoomph, this is still the way I encourage people through blogs and social media.

Kill Kids by Destroying Their Imagination

Haven't read it, but the theme sounds excellent. Dad's need to pay attention to these issues for our children and grandchildren.

TEN WAYS TO DESTROY THE IMAGINATION OF YOUR CHILD

Studying Books -- the New Old Mantra

New mantra for men: it's not enough to read. You must study.

I wrote earlier this week lamenting that men weren't readers. Ok. I'm not going to whine or cajole or plead. I will call you to a high standard, and challenge you to step up to your God-given responsibilities and challenges.

Simply passing your eyeballs over the pages of a book will not do. Invest yourself into books (that are worth it) and study, in order to strengthen your mind and thinking.

Some suggestions for study:

1. Select good book, challenging books -- the ones that help you become a better man, husband, father, leader.

2. Write the month and date you start reading a book inside the cover. You'll be amazed when you come back to books later and see how God brought that into your life at that time for a reason.

3. Read in 2 or 3 books at a time. You're less likely to get bored, and the cross-fertilization of ideas and disciplines will turbocharge your learning.

4. Write in your books. Really mark 'em up, make 'em yours. Studying means reading with pen in hand and interacting with the text.

5. Plan to pass along the best material you find, with an explanation of why you recommend it. This forces you to summarize the key ideas and place the book in the context of other books, topics, etc.

Study, men.

I have a whole course on learning faster, if you're interested.

3 Steps Forward -- Fit in Hard Thinking in Your Busy Schedule

I know you're scrambling, busy with MANY things going simultaneously. It's difficult to write, create, think clearly about complex problems, and complete projects.

Here's a three-step process towards being more fruitful (meaning, creating value for yourself and others):

1. Print off this article:
"Getting Creative Things Done: How to Fit Hard Thinking Into a Busy Schedule"

2. Read it, study it.

3. Get your calendar out and start implementing this strategy.

Start on step 1 now.

Lion Chaser's Manifesto

I have this on my bathroom mirror and read it regularly. I commend it to you!

Lion Chaser's Manifesto

Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. Grab life by the mane. Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-ordained passions. Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. Keep asking questions. Keep making mistakes. Keep seeking God. Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. Stop playing it safe and start taking risks. Expand your horizons. Accumulate experiences. Consider the lilies. Enjoy the journey. Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. Live like today is the first day and last day of your life. Don't let what's wrong with you keep you from worshiping what's right with God. Burn sinful bridges. Blaze a new trail. Criticize by creating. Worry less about what people think and more about what God thinks. Don't try to be who you're not. Be yourself. Laugh at yourself. Quit holding out. Quit holding back. Quit running away.

Chase the lion.

(Mark Batterson)

Men, But Not Readers

"The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the one who cant read them." - Mark Twain

Why is that so few men read books?

There are lists of recommended books (here's one from The "art of manliness" website -- takes a while to load all the pictures...hmmm... maybe that tells us something about men?).

Perhaps we're too easily distracted by things which are less work than reading.

Perhaps we think we've done all our reading in school.

Perhaps we're just lazy.

My counsel: buck the trends, be a man who reads.

Parenting: Preparation, Persistence, and Prayer

I recommend Rebecca Hagelin's short article, "The Myth of Experts." We dads (less so than moms) are inundated with how-to information on parenting from 'experts,' with the net effect that our confidence in how to parent is being rattled left and right.

An excerpt:
-=-=-=-=-=-

"It takes three basic stones to build the foundation for raising a child of character —preparation, persistence, and prayer.

First, prepare for the journey of raising a child (or if you are starting late, a teen) by having a vision for him or her. My young friend’s parenting confusion, like so many parents I hear from, stems from the dizzying number of child-rearing theories thrown at her that have one thing in common: mom isn’t good or smart enough to figure it out herself. The first step is simple: shut out the experts and focus on the kind of young woman you want your daughter to become. Keeping that vision in mind, it becomes much easier to know who should be shaping her heart and what type of relationships will give her life meaning. Our vision for the adults our children will become offers a coherent set of principles and values that will guide our childrearing.

Secondly, be persistent in holding onto that vision no matter what the culture throws at you. Part of never giving up means finding allies in the battle. Identify others you trust – mentors, if you will – who have been there before; and people in your faith group who will enforce what you are teaching at home. Surround yourself with people who understand that it is God who chose you to be the father of that particular son.

Third, but most importantly, pray for your child and for your own wisdom in parenting. A humble heart before our God opens our ears to hear His guidance. Pray for a heart that will love unconditionally—and then practice the virtues that express that love: generosity, patience, kindness, forgiveness."

If You Could Get Some Leadership Coaching...

I believe God is calling me to do more to develop the next generations of leaders. I'm curious for your input: if the best possible leadership coaching were available to you on an ongoing basis,

What would you learn more about?
How would you like to interact?
What would be different than your current situation?

Comment or email me, I'm very interested to hear your thoughts on this.

Don't Make This Choice

Men, I have a gut-level truth for you to process today:

We choose to procrastinate.

No one makes us procrastinate. No circumstances compel us to procrastinate. There's no one else to blame. We get to make choices in how to spend our time, our energy, and the focus of our thinking.

If you procrastinate, it's because you choose to.

Don't like it? Make a different choice.

A New Definition for M & M's

I recommend this talk about effective work, from Jason Fried. (And his book, Re-work.) Prepare to be jolted. You'll find a whole new definition for M & Ms.




Why do I post this on a blog for husbands and fathers? First, most of you are working in some environment where you experience interruptions. Second, you're in leadership roles -- and leaders need to always be thinking about effectiveness. Third, this might spark some thoughts about how you manage your family time and relationships.

How Jesus Dealt with Legalists Outside the Kingdom

One of the great persistent dangers for the Church is legalism. In several letters, Paul dealt with legalism inside the churches. Here let's look at a time when Jesus dealt with rabbinical legalism.

1 Then some Pharisees and teachers of the law came to Jesus from Jerusalem and asked, 2 “Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!”

3 Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition? 4 For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother' and ‘Anyone who curses their father or mother is to be put to death.’ 5 But you say that if anyone declares that what might have been used to help their father or mother is ‘devoted to God,’ 6 they are not to ‘honor their father or mother’ with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. 7 You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you:

8 “‘These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
9 They worship me in vain;
their teachings are merely human rules.”

10 Jesus called the crowd to him and said, “Listen and understand. 11 What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them.”

12 Then the disciples came to him and asked, “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this?”

13 He replied, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. 14 Leave them; they are blind guides. If the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit.” (Matt 15:1-13, emphasis added)

This quote from Isaiah 19:13 is an excellent summary of legalism, isn't it?

8 “‘These people honor me with their lips,
but their hearts are far from me.
9 They worship me in vain;
their teachings are merely human rules.”

God wants our words to be authentic expression of love from our hearts, which are (through His power) close to Him. And we are not to teach "merely human rules," but the commandments of God.

Jesus commandment to the disciples is simple: "Leave them" (the ESV has it "Let them alone"). Don't seek them out for confrontation. Don't follow them. Don't participate with them, but leave them behind as we follow Jesus.

Please note that Jesus didn't go after the Pharisees unless they came to him first and confronted Him. He didn't campaign against them or seek them out. And I believe the disciples got the instruction clearly because we never see the disciples going after the rabbinical leaders to confront them.

(By the way, verse 12 has to be one of the funniest verses in the Bible.)

Comedy Break!

Three of my favorite skits all time!

Ignorarrogance

Add this new word to your vocabulary: ignorarrogance.

"ig·nor·ar·ro·gance: [ ig-ner-ar-uh-guhns] –noun– offensive display of superiority or self-importance due to one’s lack of knowledge, learning, information, etc.

•Arrogance is being 90% right and 100% certain.
•Ignorarrogance is being 90% oblivious and 100% certain."


HT: Alan Danielson

Happy Thanksgiving!

For my brothers and sisters in the US, Happy Thanksgiving! If you're not in the US, I hope that you, too, will take some time to express your gratitude to God today.

Leadship Trends

If you read this blog, you're probably in a leadership role -- family, church, community, workplace.

There are some very exciting trends in church and business leadership. I keep up with dozens of blogs on leadership and management and innovation, and read 2-3 books per week. I push myself to learn more so that I can be a better leader and help others more.

If you'd like to skip a lot of the books and blogs and get the executive summary, check out this Steve Denning article, The Death-- and Reinvention of Management. This has the gist of a whole bunch of recent books and blogs. I believe God is doing something wonderful in these days!

Keeping Up with Blogs

I'm occasionally asked how I keep up with so many blogs and authors. RSS feeds are wonderful things! Instead of me clicking through to a long list of websites, I set up the feed so that every time something new is available, it's provided to me at one place.

To do this you need an RSS feed reader tool. Google Reader works very well. Michael Hyatt wrote up a nice how-to article explaining how to set it up. Easy, free, effective!

Refresh Your Bible Reading Plan

This is the time of year when I have the highest likelihood of getting off my Bible reading plans.

So just a word of encouragement: rededicate yourself to this life-giving discipline of systematic reading, study, and meditation on God's Word.

Family Devotions Resource

Dads, this looks like a terrific resource for short family devotions. Comes well-recommended.

"I Will Pray For You"

We're pretty good at saying to one another "I will pray for you."

Let's be real: our batting average is poor. We say that much more than we do it. And since we know that about ourselves, at times when other people say this to us, we think "maybe."

But Jesus is our faithful advocate:

"Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us." (Romans 8:34)

You can count in Jesus praying for you! This is a good way to encourage our own hearts and our families.